Tom Lynch

Electronic Arts will soon give video gamers an offer they can't refuse with its new "Godfather" game, to be released in the fall. But here's the best part--EA's game features the likenesses and voices of three of the original film's Oscar-nominated actors--James Caan, Robert Duvall and, drum roll, Marlon Brando. Apparently Mr. Sacheen Littlefeather recorded his voice before his death. In the game, reportedly, you are an up-and-coming hitman working for the Corleone family, gunning and dealing your way up to head honcho, "Grand Theft Auto" style. This groundbreaking move to make classic films interactive with audiences got us to thinking about other vintage Best Picture contenders...

Fighting Game (e.g. "Mortal Kombat"): You'd expect "Raging Bull," but how about "The Wizard of Oz"? Choose between Dorothy, Tin Man, Scarecrow, Cowardly Lion and the Wicked Witch and fight to the death. Win 120 times in a row and you can fight as Glenda the Good Witch. Nobody ever wants to be a Munchkin.

First Person Shooter (e.g. "Halo"): You'd expect "Taxi Driver," but how about "Annie Hall"? You see through Alvie Singer's eyes, emotionally lost between the streets of NYC and L.A. Fire off knishes at hopeful partners, but stay away from the evil Christopher Walken.

Role-Playing Game (e.g. "Final Fantasy"): You'd expect "Gladiator," but how about "The Graduate"? Keep building experience points up by bedding as many women as possible (bonus score for ladies twice your age), all the while trying to reach your final goal of riding the love bus. Make sure to stop by the United Methodist Church of La Verne, and find the magic wedding present. What's inside? One word: "plastics."

Puzzle (e.g. "Tetris"): You'd expect "A Beautiful Mind," but how about "Titanic"? Navigate your ship through the floating icebergs in order to save Leonardo DiCaprio. Bonus points for collecting the magic necklace and/or nudie paintings of Kate Winslet.

Platform (e.g. "Super Mario Bros."): You'd expect "Moonstruck," but how about "Midnight Cowboy"? Ratso Rizzo and Joe Buck make like Mario and Luigi as they collect magic "tricks" and maze their way through as assortment of big-city tunnels.

Sports (e.g. "Madden NFL"): You'd expect "Rocky," but how about "Driving Miss Daisy"? A team of old Jewish Southern belle scrum against a team of old, oppressed African-American chauffeurs in a rugby match.

Rhythm (e.g. "Dance Dance Revolution"): You'd expect "Chicago," but how about "Taxi Driver"? Choose a hairstyle and make Travis Bickle dance his way to Sport's bordello. If you don't, Jodie Foster's impress-o-meter falls.

Simulation (e.g. "The Sims"): You'd expect "The Aviator," but how about "Gandhi"? Build up an empire of adoring pacifists, but make sure to keep his starvation level high.

Arcade (e.g. "Frogger"): You'd expect "The French Connection," but how about "Casablanca"? Gobble up martinis and escape the Nazis while perusing the halls of your Moroccan hotel. This could be the beginning of a beautiful level!

Beat `em Up (e.g. "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"): You'd expect "Goodfellas," but how about "Dead Poet's Society"? The literary youngsters patrol the streets for anyone who badmouths Whitman or Dickinson. Dislike "Song of Myself"? Get a wrench upside the head!

Racing (e.g. "Gran Turismo"): You'd expect "Chariots of Fire," but how about "Ghost"? Race from heaven to hell with Best Supporting Actress Whoopi as your navigator. And do it all to save Demi Moore from that guy from Friday the 13th part VI. Can you believe this was nominated for Best Picture?

(2005-02-22)

Also by Tom Lynch

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The New York clan's self-titled debut record, recently released on Verve Forecast, lustfully captures the feeling of black-and-white, with jazzy-smoke rhythms, occasional dance beats, liquor-sippin' groove, and songs sung in five different languages
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(2005-01-18)

About a book
(2005-01-18)

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