Jamie Murnane

Lake Michigan dances on one of the protruding second floor platforms of Vision nightclub, shimmying and shaking to the DJ's beats. But this is no body of water; it's a woman sporting a skimpy bikini, swirls of blue body paint and the number 392. Her glittery blue hair is piled in a tall wave, downtown Chicago nestled in the middle.

Screams of excitement flow from the crowd below as the music gets louder and fog comes billowing down from the ceiling. The club lights create green oceanic waves across the stage-turned-catwalk. This is Hairball, a hair-design contest sponsored by City of Hope to raise money for cancer and AIDS research.

More outrageous-looking hair models enter, vying for their chance at Best Hair Color, Best Makeup, Best Costume and Best of Show. A hundred contestants from various top salons were expected, but it looks as though only around twenty made it.

"It's the first Hairball Chicago. Next year, the size will double," says event organizer Harry Giordano of City of Hope Philadelphia. "The first one in Philly seven years ago, there were only ten salons. Now there's over 450."

The DJ spins Prince's "I Would Die 4 U" as hairbrushes are thrown into the crowd and the models parade the catwalk, showing off their Chicago-themed get-ups. Screaming ensues from the proud stylists as Lake Michigan makes her appearance, followed by O'Hare Airport--complete with runway-colored dress and fiber-optic hair from which a small plane is taking off.

The models finish showing off and Giordano takes the stage to announce the winners. Best Hair Color goes to Lake Michigan for her glittery blue `do. Best Costume goes to an orange-haired model in a white flowing dress who the audience keeps calling Bucky--the Buckingham Fountain, perhaps. Winner of Best Makeup is the most unique, as it's a two-person contestant sporting the theme of the Great Chicago Fire, one dressed in black with white spots and udders as Mrs. O'Leary's cow and the other a fiery orange lantern, with long flames of hair and blinding body paint.

Best of Show, a title accompanying the prize of a $500 club party and an $800 basket of Marc Jacobs hair products, goes to # 396, wearing a shining blue gown to match her blue lipstick. Her sublime hair is layered in high blue strands with small white lights tucked inside like a Christmas tree.

The contest is over but the stylists are far from being finished celebrating. Giordano walks around to remind people about next year's Hairball and he stops to comment on an audience member's blue and pink hair. "Oh my God, I just love this," he says. "And when a gay man says that, he means it."

(2004-08-03)

Also by Jamie Murnane

The Naked City
Dressed as though she's just come from church, Carol's a polite, fragile-looking woman. Her husband George stands near a towering pine tree nearby, completely, shamelessly naked.
(2004-07-20)

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