This launch party for MCW's new, soon-to-be nationwide matchmaking service for "successful men and distinctive women" (successful equals well off; distinctive equals beautiful) is more like a waiver/photo event. First order of business—sign a waiver that, among other things, lets you know that this service makes no guarantees about a "client's character, suitability, sanity, stability, safety, attractiveness, or anything else." The attendees, even those taking it seriously, seem a little unnerved. "Well, what's sanity?" one woman remarks dryly as she signs on the dotted line. Indeed.

Second order of business: Visit the provided makeup artist/stylist and professional photographer to get your photo done for a "portfolio" to be perused by the service's rich guy clients. They pay for a year's worth of unlimited dates with MCW's portfolio, while the women pay nothing but get a crack at someone who can provide them "with the lifestyle they want." A voluptuous woman seats herself for the photographer, holding up a sign with her name on it in front of her breasts. The photographer asks her to move it down a little. " Of course," she laughs, fortified by the free glass of crummy champagne. "We want them to see the wares." Time to go home.

Also by Elaine Richardson

HOT AIR
Chris O'Donnell executive produced a TV movie where Luke Perry and Dan Cortese get lost in the Bermuda Triangle... wishful thinking, perhaps? One has to hope, otherwise there's no excuse for this attack of the has beens.
(2001-08-09)

RITE OF PASSAGE
To say Foster, 32, is unique in the local pantheon of chefs is an understatement. As one of the few high-level African-American chefs in town, he's at the top of a field where blacks are not always seen, meaning he's frequently greeted with shock and commentary.
(2001-08-09)

HOT AIR
Despite an electrifying performance by James Franco, who is sometimes a better James Dean than Dean ever was—Jimmy could be fairly whiny—this TNT biopic falls flat.
(2001-08-02)

ON THE HUNT
No matter what you think, you can always find an apartment—it's just a matter of time and effort. Time—who has that? And effort, well, that sounds a lot like work. But you can cut down on all of this by simply being informed about what you're doing.
(2001-08-02)

BE PREPARED
(2001-08-02)

CRIMEWATCH
(2001-08-02)

RUN FOR THE BORDER
(2001-08-02)

WHAT TO PAY
(2001-08-02)

CAT POWER
(2001-07-19)

SUMMER DELIGHTS
(2001-07-12)

THE CHICKS OF CAMELOT
(2001-07-12)

HOT AIR
(2001-07-12)